


One Step Closer To Being Two Steps Far From You

by Lulaypp



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Dick is trying to cheer up all his brothers, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Just someone is bleeding and that is brought up several times, Mentioning of Blood, Not something too graphic though, Tim is present but not prominent, like pretty insistent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25753816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lulaypp/pseuds/Lulaypp
Summary: A car crash had nearly killed Bruce and no matter what everyone else says, Jason knows he is the one to blame. While then, he struggles to believe that he has any right to be a part of his family.
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne
Comments: 5
Kudos: 94





	One Step Closer To Being Two Steps Far From You

**Author's Note:**

> Hi.  
> This is my actual first Batfic. It just stayed stagnant for like half a year.  
> I am a bit unfamiliar with writing Cass so I apologise if she seems OOC
> 
> As mentioned in the tags, there are insistent mentioning of blood. Not extremely graphic, but someone got hurt and was bleeding and that it is brought up several times.
> 
> If it matters, this takes place Pre-52 but somewhere a bit after where it ended since Jason is on okay-ish term with the family. They kinda hang out now.
> 
> Also note that I know very little about hospitals, especially those in America, so I'm just taking creative liberties.
> 
> One more thing, I am posting this really, really late and despite going through it and editing it multiple times, I might have left some mistakes somewhere. So sorry if there are any.

The car ride was quiet. And honestly, Jason is fine with that. It is nice. One of those rare times he and Bruce can sit alone within close proximity without at least one of them screaming. 

He had decided to follow the other bats to the Cave after patrol and stuck around for most of the day. It was the first time he had voluntarily stayed at the Wayne Manor in years. The entire family was there, although he didn’t really get to spend the entire time with them. It was a Tuesday and that means everyone that isn’t him, Dick or Alfred is either at work or school by noon, leaving the manor mostly empty. 

It was a little before six when he decided that he had been there long enough and he should get back to his own safe house. He had intended to go back on his own, probably by grapple if not on foot or by bus. But Bruce had miraculously arrived home at the same moment Jason was at the front door, saying goodbye to Alfred and Dick. Bruce had offered to drive him home and Dick was doing puppy eyes behind Bruce’s back. So, he accepted. 

At first, he didn’t think it would go well. Despite the fact that he had been hanging out with them as of late, there are still times when the occasional prickling tension among them snapped into a fight. But as the car reached the bustling city, Jason thinks that maybe things are going well between them after all. 

The day had been so peaceful, that he half considered skipping patrol tonight and just stay in. His left upper arm was stabbed yesterday so he might as well let it rest. Maybe he can read that book Tim gave him a while ago. 

He can just picture it. It would be just him, a good book, a teapot of his favourite tea and maybe even some soft music if he feels like it. Just the thought of it makes him feel contented. 

But of course, the universe hates him too much to give him a break. 

\- 

Dick pulled pull out his ringing phone from his pocket as he slid out from his car. 

He had spontaneously decided that today is ice-cream day and is looking forward to bringing home two or three tubs of the sugary, dairy treat. 

On the phone screen was Jason’s name. He frowned. They are in more or less good terms now. They occasionally work together on missions and Dick was even allowed to stay at one of Red Hood’s safehouse some weeks back. But for Jason to call him, something has to be up. 

He picked up the call, “Hello? Jason?” 

“Dick,” the voice on the other side was shaky and breathless. Dick instantly know something’s wrong. 

He quickly turned back to his car as he asked, “Jay what happened? What’s wrong? Where are you?” 

“I’m so- sorry,” Jason’s voice hitched with a sob, worrying Dick even more. “It was my fault and I didn’t notice it and it was supposed to hit me but then he turned the car and then- now- He’s not moving! Is he- Why won’t he move?” his voice raised with panic and desperation. 

Dick started the car engine, a hand gripping the wheel tightly. Something happened. Something really bad. He needs to know where his brother is. Wasn’t he supposed to be with Bruce? 

“Jason. Little wing. Can you calm down for me?” he kept his voice soft. “Breathe slowly.” 

“C-can’t. I can’t get us out.” There was a loud banging sound on the other end. “Dick I- I don’t know what to do.” 

“Jay. Tell me what happened. Is Bruce with you?” 

“I- I don’t know. He is bleeding Dick. Bruce’s not moving and there is so much blood.” 

\-- 

Dick slid to a stop at the glass doors of Gotham General’s emergency department. On the other side, he could see his brother. As he slowly pushed the door, he can hear his brother yelling, curses flying like casual words of a spoken language. His victim, and possibly assailant, was a nurse. Dick stepped closer knowing full well what the commotion is about. Luckily, the waiting room was empty. 

"Sir," the nurse was saying. Her voice stern and firm. "Your head is bleeding and so is that arm. It needs to be checked." 

"I don't need you to," Jason responded, his, arms were crossed, fist clenched around his suspiciously red left arm that Dick remembered Alfred patching up last night. "You think I haven't had worst? I know how to treat a wound, so-" 

"Jason!" Dick intervened. The nurse turned to look at him in surprise, not expecting an interruption. Jason on the other hand had noticed Dick before he even entered and only rolled his eyes in frustration. "Sorry," Dick apologised to the nurse with a smile. "It's okay. I'll check on him." Jason looks like he was going to protest but Dick stopped him with a warning look which was countered with Red Hood's murderous glare. 

The nurse doesn't seem satisfied with the outcome but gave in with a nod as she walked away. "See that you do." 

As soon as she is gone Jason dropped himself on a chair and Dick followed suit. There was a momentary silence before the younger spoke up, rubbing his face with hands. "Anything to say, Goldie? Might as well go for it." 

Dick kept his eyes on the glass door to his left. "What is there to say?" 

"Oh, I don't know, pester me maybe. Isn't that what you usually do?” Jason changed his voice to imitate Dick’s, “'Let me see that cut' or ‘Don’t go out with that wound’. Or better yet, finally admit to yourself that it was my doing. That this-" 

"Jay. Stop it," Dick snapped. He turned his head to his brother, eyes flickering briefly to the red crusted flecks on the white streak of hair. "For one, I know that telling you to slow down for your injuries would be futile. You're too stubborn. And I told you. I refuse to blame you for this. I won't. You could not have stopped this." 

Jason merely responded with a scoff, shoving his hands into his grey hoodie’s pockets and glaring at the floor. 

Getting no further response, Dick fully faced his brother, eyeing the dark red patch on the younger's shoulder and the splashy crimson patterns on the sleeve’s cuffs. "Jason," he called. "Jay, look at me." Jason finally lifted his eyes to meet Dick's. His green eyes hide what almost seems like fear and guilt behind a defensive mesh of simmering anger. It is obvious who he is furious with. "I don't blame you for this. And you can't either. You were there, but that does not make it your fault." 

Jason stared for a moment before huffing out a breath. "You're an idiot. Like you were there to judge." 

Before Dick can respond, the glass doors swung open as the rest of his siblings rushed in. 

"Where is Father?" Damian immediately demanded, stopping in front of Dick. 

"Where do you think he is?" Jason snapped. 

Damian whipped his head to face him, eyes blazing. "Of course you would know," he hissed as Jason sprang to his feet. 

"Enough!" Cass and Dick cut in. 

Jason gave an eye roll, grumbling something incoherent as he marched out of the room. 

Tim gave an uncertain glance towards the glass doors. "One of us should-" 

"No. Let him go," Dick said, leaning back in his chair with a tired sigh. "He doesn't want to be followed and he would be gone by now." 

Tim took a seat to Dick's left before slowly asking, "So, what happened? You only told me Bruce and Jason were at the hospital and that I should get everyone else here." 

Cass sat beside him while Damian stood in front of Dick, arms crossed. "I'm a bit uncertain myself," Dick started with a frown, "but I was in the city earlier when Jason called me. He said that there was an accident and that Bruce was hit." He didn't mention that Jason was hysterical, saying that he didn’t mean for it to happen. The panic and fear in his younger brother’s voice still ring in his mind while he could do nothing but try to calm him down through the phone. “He also mentioned that I should get to Gotham General soon. As I said, the details were unclear so I am uncertain on the ‘how’.” 

“Bad?” Cass asked. 

Dick recalled what Jason had said. _“Dick there is blood. Too much! I c-can’t stop it. The car door is in him, Dick. And he still won’t wake up!”_

“I think it is pretty bad,” he finally said. “I haven’t had a chance to ask anyone but from what I understand it sounds like it.” 

\- 

About an hour later, the sun has set and Cass had already gone back home to get ready for patrol. Dick had decided to stay with Damian, who refuse to leave the waiting room until they get an update, and Tim, who has fallen asleep. The youngest Wayne had been staring out the window the entire time, face drawn into a perpetual frown. Dick sighed. There are times when he is reminded of how similar Damian is to his father. 

Careful not to jostle Tim’s head on his shoulder, he called for his youngest brother, “Dami. Come here.” At first, Damian only hardened his gaze on the rooftop across the street but when his brother called for him again, he finally turned. Dick beckoned Damian over, who complies, taking a seat next to Dick and allowed an arm to pull him into a side hug he secretly loves. Dick gently rubs the younger’s shoulder. “What’s wrong?” 

Damian didn’t answer. Only snuggling deeper into the comfort by a fraction of an inch. A minute of silence passed before he hesitantly spoke up. “I.. am concerned with Father’s condition.” 

“Me too,” Dick said, choosing his words carefully. “But all we can do now is hope for the best.” 

They fell into another lapse of silence until Damian spoke again, “Someone should go after Todd, lest he gets into trouble. He was emotional and would be prone to make mistakes on patrol.” Dick smiled at the underlying concern in his voice. In the past few months, Damian has started to show concern for his siblings, albeit in his own way. 

“I think Cass would keep an eye on him, make sure he gets back up if he needs it.” 

Just then, they heard quick footsteps coming from behind the door and Damian swiftly pulled away. Tim immediately sat up straight, as if he wasn’t asleep seconds before, as a doctor step through the entrance. “Family of Bruce Wayne?” the doctor asked. 

“Yes,” Dick replied as he stood up to meet the doctor. “How is he?” 

\- 

Jason was only physically present as he swung through his territory, his body working absentmindedly. While his eyes and ears scan the streets for any signs of trouble, his mind sees an entirely different scene and hears a recent memory. 

The fight that he escalated. 

_“_ _Well, I did it._ _Like I_ _said, I di_ _dn'_ _t need_ _any_ _help.”_

_“You barely made it out, Jason._ _You may have done it this time, but–“_

_“I_ _won’t need_ _it._ _”_

_“There is no fault_ _in asking for your siblings'_ _assistance.”_

_“_ _They are not my siblings Bruce_ _!_ _And_ _I’m not your sidekick anymore._ _Don’t tell what to do.”_

_“_ _Stop trying to distance yourself from everyon_ _e!_ _”_

The out of control truck that he noticed too late. 

_It happened_ _so quickly._ _The car turned sharply_ _to the right_ _before the_ _window_ _shattered_ _i_ _nwards_ _._ _Everything was suddenly too loud_ _._

And his father who just would not wake up. 

_Something was sticking out of Bruce’s side. And the red stream refused to stop even when he pressed down with all his might. And Bruce is not moving_

Jason was so deep into his thoughts that he nearly ran into a figure who had just materialised in front of him. 

Black Bat. Cassandra. 

He scowled. “And what are you doing here?” Over time, he had begun to like Cass who, unlike Dick, knows how to keep a respectable distance and stay quiet. But she always seems to jump out of nowhere, especially when he doesn’t need company. Like now. 

For a moment, Black Bat remained quiet and unmoving. “Distracted,” she finally spoke. “Patrol together. Good for both of us.” 

Red Hood’s frown deepened. “If Golden Boy sent you, tell him to find someone else to babysit. I found Replacement falling asleep during a stakeout two days ago.” He stepped to the left and moved around her but she grabbed his arm before he got far. 

“No. Not Nightwing. On my own... want. Desire. We are both not thinking... clearly and may make mistakes. Together, better.” 

Within the next few hours, Red Hood and Black Bat had managed to prevent a bank robbery, stopped some muggings, answered the Bat-Signal and take down Firefly. The two eventually part ways and Red Hood went back to his own living space. The night had managed to reopen the wound on his arm _again_ along with giving him a couple of burn marks. 

He had landed on the roof of his safehouse when he sees it, a figure in the shadows. If he didn’t already know who is it, the blue colours would have given it away. 

“Don’t follow me,” he warned before jumping onto the fire escape and opening the window. 

He was just three steps in when his hand was pulled back. “Jason, wait.” 

He felt his temper return. “What do you want Dick?” he growled, yanking his helmet off before turning to Nightwing. “I’ve had enough social interaction for one day. Cass already followed me everywhere tonight. I did not kill anyone. I did not even permanently injure anyone. And neither did I ‘jump into danger headfirst’. What more do you want?!” 

Dick blinked, not quite expecting an outburst. “Jay, no. That is not what I’m here for. I came to talk about Bruce.” 

Jason scoffed. "And just what is it that you want to talk about? We've gone through this, haven't we? You already know what happened. I have already told you how it happened. And you already decided that I’m wrong.” 

"No not-" 

"Not what!?" His fist met the wall to his right. "I knew that was a bad idea. I knew I should have ignored your 'bonding' pleas. I should have denied Bruce's invitation of 'Let me drive you home'. But of course. I was stupid. An idiot. For a moment I thought maybe we could forget our arguments and be on our separate merry ways. But like that would ever happen. I fought with him, nearly got him killed, by a car crash of all things." 

Dick grabbed his brother's shoulders and shook him once. "What happened was NOT your fault, Jason! Face it." 

"Then whose?" Before Dick could get another word in, Jason turned away, ripping of his domino mask and stepped into the living area. "I was so stupid. I should have known it would have happened." He collapsed on the sofa, all energy seems to have left him. His anger dissipated, making way for other emotions he’s been trying to hold back. He rested his head in his hands. "I could have killed him. I said that I hated him and he nearly died. He loathes me now. You should too.” 

Dick slowly sat by his brother's side. "That is what I came to tell you." He said softly. “The injury turns out to be not as bad as it looks. While it did draw a lot of blood and there was a minor complication at first, they say that he’s alright now. And he woke up before I left the hospital. He was worried and wanted to see you." 

\-- 

Jason stood in front of the door to Bruce’s hospital room. Dick said Bruce had wanted to see him. He doubts it. Why would Bruce want to see him? He is the reason why Bruce is here in the first place. He honestly should have seen the truck coming. Bruce wouldn't have gotten distracted if Jason had not started an argument. Bruce won't even be out of the house that day if Jason had gone back to his apartment alone. Then Bruce would not have to save him. Swerved the car last minute to take most of the impact so Jason wouldn't die. Why did Bruce even try to save him? Bruce hated Jason. Everyone knows that. Red Hood killed. Uses guns. Goes against many of Bruce's rules. 

Jason glanced at the empty hallways again. He should leave before the guard does another sweep of the floor. He still hasn’t looked over the injuries he acquired from the night so he might as well head back to his safehouse. 

But before he could leap out of the window, "You are not leaving." Red Hood whipped around a knife slipping from his sleeve. In the shadows of the hallway stood Robin. Damian stepped forward, pushing his hood back. "Not before Father sees you." 

Red Hood glared. "He wouldn't want to and I'll be happy to comply." 

Damian scoffed and stepped right in front of the taller vigilante. "Just for this once Jason, put your feelings aside. I don't care what you want." He jabs a finger to Jason's chest. "But your father wants to see you whether you like it or not. So stop being selfish about it." With a final stern glare, Robin stepped around his brother and leaped out of the window. 

Jason was only half aware of the youngest bat flying out as the words sank in. He knows Damian won't lie to him. Damian is no liar. But why _would_ Bruce want to see him? 

\--- 

The window soundlessly slid shut behind him as he made his way closer to the sole bed in the room. Jason placed his helmet on the bedside table, glancing at the figure on the bed. Bruce seems to be sleeping. 

Taking a seat on the chair by the bed’s left side, he sighed. He doesn’t know what to do now that he is here. He doesn’t want to be here. Doesn’t think he should. He doesn’t deserve it. Not after what he did. 

"I'm sorry Bruce," he finally spoke. "For fighting with you, y'know. Earlier." He glanced up to make sure Bruce is still asleep before he pulled his chair closer and bury his face in his hands. 

“It is not that I don't want to hang out more and... be a family. But... I don't think you would want to. I'll only continue to disappoint you. Like I always do. You... you like the old kid. The Jason that was a Robin. Who died. And that's it. He is dead. And he is not coming back. He is never coming back. I am not coming back. I'm Red Hood, I'm everything you hate. I'm a killer, I use guns. Even if I don't kill now, that doesn't change the fact that I did. 

“Not to mention they hate me. Dick can talk all he likes but I took Robin from him. His title, costume, his name. And Tim." He scoffed, running his hand through his hair. "I nearly killed him, Bruce. That kid used to look up at me and I tried to kill him. I could have killed him. I just didn't because I thought it would, y'know, hurt more. Both you and him. Leaving him like that. And I guess it worked. No matter how much time we spent in each other's presence, he sometimes gets freaked when we end up in one room with no one else." 

With another sigh, Jason rested his head on the bed, words muffled by the sheets. "I messed up Bruce. I'm sorry I turned out this way. Sorry that I yelled at you earlier. I mean- I guess I can see that... you are trying your best to, I dunno, reach out, give space and all that stuff. But I can't. I can't just put myself in the family. I tried yesterday and look how it turned out. You're here and I am here. Talking to myself. I don't belong here, Bruce. If I stay, I'll just disappoint you. I'm not mad at you though. Despite what I said earlier, I'm not. Not really. Just upset, I guess. I hope you know that." He remained silent for a while, letting the fatigue take over him as he stayed there. 

When suddenly, he felt a hand combing his hair. The movements were gentle, soft, slowly making his tired eyes close. It was familiar. It reminds him of fearful, sleepless nights. It reminds him of stay up late studying in hopes to catch his father coming back home from a solo patrol. It reminds him... it is Bruce. His eyes snapped open as he jolts up and sprang to his feet. On the bed, was Bruce. Awake and staring at him. 

"Bruce?" Jason's mind started to panic. He really hopes Bruce did not hear any of that. He cannot. 

"Hm. Jason." Bruce replied. "I thought you were asleep." 

"I... I wasn't. But you- When- How long have you been up? Did you-" 

"I don't think that matters. It is better if I know and understand what you think Jason." 

Jason wanted to yell, 'It isn't okay!'. That Bruce wasn't supposed to hear any of that. But he didn't. 

"Come here," Bruce said, patting the empty spot on the bed. When Jason didn't move, he sighed, "There is nothing wrong with telling someone, especially your family about how you feel. You can be honest with us, with me." 

"What if I don't want to?" Jason let a snarl slip into his voice. "What if I don't want anything to do with this stupid family? What if I _want_ to be alone?" 

"We would never know, won't we. You are still one of us, Jason. No matter what you believe, you can come back to the family. Our family." 

"Yeah. And where did that bring us to." Jason gestured to the room. "No thanks to me." 

Bruce frowned. "So that is where this is coming from. You think you are to blame for a road accident." 

"It is not just a road accident! You were dying!" 

"But I didn't and – “ 

“That changes nothing, Bruce! Nothing.” 

“Doesn’t it?” Bruce asked. 

\- 

A blanket of prickling silence fell across the room. Jason crossed his arms. Bruce had long learned that it is a defensive habit. One his son never grew out of. After a moment, Bruce continued, “Jason, don’t blame yourself for things that were out of your control.” 

“Except it wasn’t,” Jason spoke, his voice wavering. “I shouldn’t have fought with you earlier. I shouldn’t have come to the manor yesterday. I should leave.” 

“Jason wait,” Bruce called, pushing himself up despite his injured side telling him not to. “Do not go.” Jason had turned away but he didn’t step further. “Sure I was distracted by talking to you and this probably wouldn’t have happened if you went home on your own. But the reason why I am in bed is because I don’t want you to get hurt. I saw the vehicle coming our way and I knew that it could have killed you.” 

“You should have let that happen,” Jason’s voice came out quiet and shaky. 

Bruce blinked. “What?” 

“Why did you save me? You should have just let me die.” Jason whipped back to face him, eyes watery. “Why did you sacrifice yourself for me. I’m not worth risking your life. Not worth risking anything. I never am.” 

“Your life is always worth risking everything because you are my son. No matter what you think Jay, no matter what you try to make yourself believe, you are always worth saving. I’m not always good at showing it, but I love you, Jaylad. Always.” Bruce beckoned his son over again. “Now come here.” 

This time Jason complied, stepping over hesitantly. After carefully moving over to squeeze in his second son beside him, Jason immediately buried himself into his father’s uninjured side. Bruce wrapped his arm around his son as he started shaking, muffled sobs escaping him. 

Jason burrowed deeper into the comfort of his father as he felt a soft kiss on his head, sleep slowly engulfing him. 

Part of him still believes himself to be an outcast. He doesn’t belong here. He doesn’t deserve Bruce, the family. But if Bruce is willing to believe otherwise, then maybe he does have a place with them. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read. If there are mistakes or the likes, please point it out. I would like to fix them.  
> Hope you had enjoyed that! Thanks for reading!


End file.
